< ouch >

Raymond: Done and done.
Me: Hey that's what I say! Raymond...I'm rubbing off on you. How does it feel to be me? As good as you thought it would?
Raymond: No, not really.

< on my vendetta against the shredder >

Me: I WIN!
Raymond: Please stop. Both the shredder and I know that you’ve won. We know that you’re victorious.

raymond fact #6

raymond's favorite color was green. i mean, is green.

< i don't care >

Me: Remember when people used to have their own websites on geocities?
Raymond: Yeah. I still have mine.
Me: Wow. Yeah, mine made me sad. It was soooo bad.
Raymond: Ok…And your point is…?

< inappropriate touching >

Me: Ok I’m done with lunch.
Raymond: No you’re not. Look at all that in your bowl.
Me: Oh, there aren’t anymore noodles. I can’t eat that stuff without noodles. I’m done.
Raymond: There’s seaweed in there!
Me: Uh, do you want my seaweed?
Raymond: No. I’m just saying seaweed is good alone and you shouldn’t waste it.
Me: Well, I only want to eat it if it has noodles next to it. So if you don’t want it, I’m throwing it away.
Raymond: I don’t touch other peoples’ food. I might touch their mail, but not their food.

< pick up line >

Me: Raymond, what’s your pick up line?
Raymond: I don’t have a pick up line.
(thinks)
Raymond: Well, I guess the classic would be, “Have we met before?”
Raymond: But then she says no and that’s it.

raymond fact #5

raymond likes seaweed.